What to do in a crisis | Looking for signs of hope
One of my good friends recently shared her stories of working with a crisis hotline. She inspired me beyond belief to take action, and be a spark of light to someone who is burdened by absolute darkness. I spent part of the afternoon learning how she developed the communication skills, compassion, and energy techniques for effectively helping others while managing her self-care.
Honestly, I wanted to help. I was so engaged in finding out how I could do what she does, help those who are paralyzed by their fears and be a friend to anyone in need. She explained that, while an unfortunate chunk of people was truly convinced to end their life, a drastic majority of callers were just looking for a friend to talk and help them overcome a tough time.
While I realized I may not have the guts to try and talk someone out of taking their life, I do have the platform to support anyone who needs to find hope. I know what it's like to feel alone and lonely, to need someone to talk and listen to, and I want to help you work through the energy that breaks you down.
So, here's what I want to propose. If you're battling something dark, if you're going through a tough time, or you need a friend to help you work through some issues, check out all the resources we have on TheButterflyEffect. From limiting beliefs to energy work, deep inner child work, and breathing techniques, we've made this platform openly free to the public to access insights that will bring you to hope for better times.
With that said, this blog post is to remind you of what there is to look up to. In times of personal dread, darkness, and what seems like an otherwise insurmountable obstacle, you are always in the midst of light.
It's the truth. I've discovered from the deepest inner work and personal hell, that all fear is a gateway to show you what empty places in your heart need filling (with love, of course.) When you're afraid, hurt, hopeless, or in a panic, all your soul is calling for is a (deep) new dimension of self-love and love for the world.
Of course, to someone who feels like the world is against them, there is nothing you can look for outside of yourself that will be proof that something good may happen. When life seems hopeless around you, however, would you even try to look for something good around you?
Here's a little story. There was once a time where I couldn't find anything good about my life. I was stuck in this dark hole of fear and hopelessness, nothing could ever take my eyes off the sh*t I was focused on. And, then one day, this old, blind woman told me that Life was beautiful. I spent two weeks living with her, watching her wake up in the middle of the night in terror, hurting on the inside and, in that time, I learned she had been abused in her younger years. I'm still not sure of the extent of her trauma, but what her family told us sounded very difficult. She had it hard.
But, in spite of everything that she endured, all the darkness that could have consumed her, she continued to live on with the words in her heart "life is beautiful." About a month ago, she passed well into her 90s.
She inspired me to practice this little exercise. Next time you find hopeless like the world is collapsing in on you, stop for a moment and look around. Get outside if you have to, even if it's cold and the clouds are grey and look for one thing that might be pretty.
A bird, a tree swaying in the wind, tune in to the sound of rain, look for an animal, a bug, or a pretty person. Seek to find one smile or something that will bring a smile to your face. Any which is fine.
If you're in absolute despair, and even looking around seems to contradict what you want to see... Stop yourself there. Find out what you want to see.
There it is, my dear. Start to define what you want to see in your life.
All depression ever is is seeing, in our life, that which we don't want to see. Moreover, it means being more focused on what we don't want to see than what we do hope to witness.
So, stop yourself there. What do you want to see in your life? When you look for something to find even the smallest shred of happiness or excitement, what are you looking for?
When you feel like there's nothing to live for and I ask you to go outside and find something that might bring a smile to your face, what will you look for?
When you feel like you don't want to be who you are, like your life isn't the way you wanted it to be like, who do you want to be?
Like I said, our fears and hurts, and even our dislikes, are merely gateways to show us what matters most to us.
Don't want to be alone in the world, or are you sick and tired of not having something to live for? What do you want to be? What do you want to live for?
Starting with these questions will show you where you stand now (which, yes, is usually painful,) but it will always show you exactly where your ideal destination is. Start there.
And, then, focus on - instead of "wanting" anything, "be" it and "have" it already.
My friends, with this exercise though difficult in the times where fear, hopelessness, and darkness reign our space, we must identify with what we want and then stop limiting ourselves to just wanting it.
There is a huge shift in energy when you go from "I want to be happy" to simply "I AM happy." You could want something for the rest of your life, but the moment you decide you already are what you want, and you already have how you want it, the entire universe shifts in a matter of seconds.
I hope this brings you hope. I hope this is a light where you need it.
And, while the journey is trivial and long, I have done the work to give you a clear guide on how to get where you want to go. Just start with hope, wanting, and of course, being what you want.
Light is always at the end of the tunnel, but enjoy what's made in this cavern as the meadow you desire arrives sooner than you think. Walking with you in the cave that is part of the path.
Always a guiding light,
DISCLAIMER: If this article didn’t help you and you are urging the need to take extreme measures, please call your local Crisis or Suicide Hotline for assisted help and to work your way through these very difficult decisions. Help is here, you are not alone. If you need someone to talk to, please do. We need you in this world, let us help you understand that. While I can’t share the long list of International numbers for those in need across the globe, I know that your local hotline will help you find a happy medium and guide you through these rough waters. I love you.